What Sexual Disease Do You Have? (How Do You Get Turned On?)

Imagine you’re watching some porn. What are you fantasizing about?
A hot guy/girl with lots of tattoos, piercings, and a couple of scars (rawr)
Biting someone's neck. (Double rawr)
BLOOD (*muahahaha.* *evil laugh*)
Screwing in a bathtub (um…okay…)
Ripping someone's clothes off and jumping them at a bus stop. (Wow, don’t you think that’s a bit forward? Desperate much?)
FIRE!!!
Both of you massaging each other- all over (*wink)
Just making out on the couch- it doesn’t get that far.(God, you have no imagination, do you?)
The hot guy/girl in the band you like. (*cough* *insert celebrity's name here* *cough*)
Fantasizing? Why would you fantasize? You’re watching PORN!!! (And I bet you have a lot on your computer, right?)
Screwing a girl while she's sleeping. (Uh…okay…freak…)

Pick a colour:
All the colours of the rainbow
Black
Red
Blue
NAKED!!!....Um...what was the question?
FIRE!!!
Pink
Green
Whatever colour that guy's wearing.
White
Whatever colour of the sheets you're on while you're screwing the sleeping girl.

You’re walking home through a dark alley when someone grabs you from behind and starts to feel you up. What do you do?
Hope they have a scar down their cheek. And a lip piercing. And a tattoo. Because that’d be hot.
Hope he/she bites your neck.
Turn around and RIP THEIR THROAT OUT!!! Then lap up the blood.
Grab your water bottle and drench the both of you
Turn around and rip his/her clothes off.
Take out your lighter. FIRE!!!
Start feeling him/her up back.
Turn around and start making out with them.
Hope it’s that guy/girl you met at a party once that you’ve been kind of, but not really stalking for three weeks.
Take out a camera.
Bash him on the head and knock him unconscious. He’s not a sleeping girl!!

Your boy/girlfriend says he/she loves you and wants to take it to the next step. What do you do?
Agree, and take him/her to the nearest tattoo parlour to get your name tattooed on their ass.
Agree, and bite them harder.
Take out your trusty knife and gouge your name in his/her back, then lick the blood off while you both moan with pleasure. Well, he might be moaning with blood loss, or pain, but he’s safely handcuffed to the wall.
Take them to the bathroom and screw in the shower.
Rip their clothes off.
Agree, then when things are heating up you take out some chilli powder and oil. FIRE!!!!
Ask if they want a massage.
Make out with him/her.
You have a boyfriend/girlfriend? Is it to make that guy/girl over there jealous?
Set up the video camera.
Why in the hell would you have a boyfriend? You like screwing sleeping girls! Duh.

You’re headed for a wild night out. Where do you go?
The tattoo parlour. And then the bar across from it. All the really tattooed and pierced guy/girls go there. And some have scars from the bar fights.
You go to a vampire fetish club. Biting!!
You go to a vampire fetish club. BLOOD!!
To your bathtub.
To a nudist club, and RIP PEOPLE”S CLOTHES OFF!!
To a forest fire. BURNING!!!!
To a massage parlour.
To your boyfriend/girlfriend’s house. To make out with them.
You go to a house party to try to find that guy/girl that works at Starbucks you’ve been staring at for two months. You like to stand in their bushes and look in the window.
To a special screening of a new porn movie. Or just in front of your computer. PORN!!
To screw some sleeping girls.

Pick a dessert.
Whipped cream on a guy/girl with lots of tattoos.
Hard candy. Any hard candy.
BLOOD!!!!
A glass of water.
The baker. Wearing an apron. Which you could RIP OFF!! Then they could leave.
Anything flambé. FIRE!!!!
Strawberry shortcake massage oil.
Peppermint gum. In your boy/girlfriend’s mouth.
Anything that guy’s having.
Two porn stars in some pudding on the television
Chocolate cake. On the bedside table of the sleeping girl you’re screwing.

Your neighbour is making a lot of noise when you’re trying to sleep. What do you do?
Send your tattooed and pierced boyfriend to go scare the stupid slumber party of kids in the next house. They’ll shit themselves when they see the massive scar over his left eye.
Go and bite someone.
This calls for a MASSACRE!!!BLOOD!!!!!!!
Take a bath.
Go and knock on the door. When they answer the door, complain about the noise, and then rip their clothes off.
BURN THE HOUSE DOWN!!!!!!!FIRE!!!!!!!
Call the cops, then touch yourself while you wait for them to break up the house party full of drunken teenagers.
Climb in their window and make out with someone.
Crash the party. Through the window you saw the guy/girl you saw on the street once with their boy/girlfriend.
Stay up and look at a good porn magazine.
Screw a sleeping girl.

Thanks for taking this quiz! What do you think?
I think I’ll go and give my boyfriend another piercing.
It was awesome!! Can I bite you?
BLOOD!!!
I think now I’m going to sit in my bathtub.
I loved this quiz. I should tell my friends to take it too after I go rip that guy’s clothes off.
FIRE!!!!!!
I think I’m out of massage oil. Shit. Is baby oil okay?
Can I kiss you? Or you? Or you?
I thought it was cool- good questi….wait, there’s that guy I met once! I have to go follow him! I’ll be right back!
It was an awesome quiz!! I’ll take it again while I’m waiting for my porn to load.
Can’t talk…busy screwing a sleeping girl.

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